I would have never guessed...

This morning when I woke up and got ready for another day at internship, I thought about music. I ran through the quickly becoming memorized songs in my mind. I sang "Paper Moon" as I showered, reviewing the Dm and Cm7 chords in my head. As I drove I thought about "Chatanooga Choo Choo" and "Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy"... and how I need to learn more Frank Sinatra.

As we drove to Elgin to meet an imminent patient, who had just signed up for hospice, I thought about creating an environment that would be comforting and peaceful for someone who may die while we were there. As we read over her chart before going into her room I read "90 years old" and preped for my favorites "All of Me" or "Sentimental Journey". I never would have guessed that when her daughters talked about her that she would be described as being someone who while ironing her clothes "jammed" to Van Morrison. Someone who introduced her daughters and even granddaughters to The Doors. We were informed that her new favorite song is "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy".

We talked with the family for a while. Then played a few things... "Proud Mary", a few Beatles songs, as we sang "Brown Eyed Girl" I held the patients hand, stroked her hair, and sang close to her ear (she had lost a lot of hearing previously). Then in between songs I looked up "Save a Horse..." on my blackberry

** Thank you technology**

My supervisor looked at me and asked, "Do you know it?"

"You bet!" I replied.

**Thank goodness I went to Monmouth College (ie: cornfields) and fell in love with country music**

It's actually pretty easy to play on the guitar as long as you can get the strum going - basically it's just a whole lot of fun. The patient's daughter got right up close to her mom and we both sang to her. Full volume, truly "rocking out".

By the end of the song the patient had opened her eyes, her brow unfurrowed, she looked much more comfortable and at ease, and her daughter reported that she had squeezed her hand. We decided to end on a positive note... AND the nurse came in pretty directly after (likely wondering what the hell was going on). I can only imagine what anyone walking by thought! I felt like a crazy person real music therapist. This was what it was all about! Making the patient and their family the experts in their own care and meeting them where they are.As we said goodbye, the daughters (through their tears) could not say enough...

"This is the most relaxed she's been!"

"I know she heard that!"

"That was amazing, she hasn't been awake at all today."

"I hope you can come back"

"Thank you"

After I returned to my car, I shot of a few texts of disbelief to my Mom and Dad.

"I didn't know you knew how to play that song" they texted back.

"Neither did I"

When I woke up this morning I knew which songs I could play for clients. I knew the generalizations we make about people's preferred music and I could go from there. I knew we would enter people's lives and share with them our talent. I knew I would be doing something I loved and hoped would change someone's situation.

I NEVER would have guessed that the songs I knew and the generalizations I made would be thrown out the window and yet I could still do my job successfully.

Cheer's Big and Rich - you're music is truly enjoyed by all generations.

Prelude

prel·ude

  –noun

1.

a preliminary to an action, event, condition, or work ofbroader scope and higher importance.

2.

any action, event, comment, etc. that precedes somethingelse.

3.

Music 

a.

a relatively short, independent instrumental composition,free in form and resembling an improvisation.

b.

a piece that precedes a more important movement.

c.

the overture to an opera.

d.

an independent piece, of moderate length, sometimesused as an introduction to a fugue.

e.

music opening a church service; an introductory voluntary.

A new beginning.

Two years ago, on an exceptionally rainy day I drove the hour treck through cornfield to the University of Iowa. Having lived in the Quad Cities for three years I was ready for something new… and I was about to start that adventure. On that rainy day I met a fantastic woman, Dr. Mary Adamek. Former president of the American Music Therapy Association, Director of the University of Iowa Music Therapy Program, and a wonderful mentor. She immediately put me on the right track to completing the music therapy equivalency program (I had previously majored in Music:Vocal Performance at Monmouth College – graduating in 2006). That fall I started classes at the University and within days knew that this was exactly where I was supposed to be.

Fast forward to last November, just after attending the National Convention in Cleveland, OH I set out on my first internship interview. Before convention I talked with supervisors and teaching assistants. I set up mock interviews and rehearsed answers to ensure controlling my impulse to get flustered. While at convention I talked with every professional in Hospice that I could and went to session after session on Hospice care. Friends of mine had interviews scheduled during conference and I picked their brains. My dear friend Lindsay practiced my interview piano piece with me and in my spare time went back to the hotel room to practice my guitar.

So, after conference I returned to Chicago and headed out on my first interview. Things went well… well, except for getting a little lost going there. And the sight singing. And the one exceptionally intimidating interviewer. I felt great about the interview (statements like “Oh! We didn’t expect you to have your pieces memorized” were a boost to my confidence that I had impressed) and at the same time I cried in the parking lot before even driving away. I flip flopped, cried, and prayed for most of the drive home. I wanted this so bad…

“On behalf of all of the music therapists at Seasons Hospice & Palliative Care of Illinois, I would like to offer you a position to intern here starting in June 2011.  Please let me know if you have decided to accept the position.  It was a pleasure meeting you today, and I look forward to hearing from you.”

~ time stamped four hours after my interview

Of course my generally paranoid attitude took this as a “great they don’t have anyone else and have to settle for me”… but in my heart I know I did a great job interviewing and I knew this was where I was supposed to be.

A few months, multiple trips with my car packed to the gills, sweat, tears, worried, and excitement later… I started my internship at Seasons Hospice in Chicago, IL.

This blog is my story… so that if anyone cares to read it might find hope, direction, lessons (on what not to do) or guidance. Or maybe they’ll read about my (mis)adventures and think “thank God that didn’t happen to me” or “that girl is crazy”. But also so that in 20 years when I’m a cranky old MT, cynical and worn down, I can go back and read about this exhilarating time. Just like the beginning of the opera, or the musical… when the lights dim, the audience falls silent in anticipation, and the conductor takes the stand. This time in my life when the prelude begins and the story starts to unfold. While my eyes are still twinkling and my heart is ready to burst with excitement.